Pilates.
That awesome mind-body-spirit exercise, that conjures up images of serene beauties balanced oh so elegantly and effortlessly on big blue balls .
People wandering around with headbands and flowers and perfect posture, bending and contorting like yoga - but more hardcore, in that special Zen kind of way.
Meh -- not so much hey ....
I just did a Pilates class - at a brand new gym , that I joined a week ago. My first Pilates class as a matter of fact.
I love yoga. I don't get to do it as often as I'd like at the old gym ( they had 1 class a week, which I couldn't always get to because of work) , so when this new gym opened up with promises of Yoga, Pilates and the combo special "Body Balance" at least 7 different times a week - that was me , hooked.
Today was the first Pilates class ever, for both me, and for this particular gym. I think it went well for the gym. I'll let you know how it went for me, when my muscles start talking to me again.
It wasn't too full - a nice big studio, plenty of space - decent sound system, so I could hear the drill-sergeant just fine.
Let me tell you , those core muscles of mine are very sorry. They are very sorry that they dared to be in me, they are very sorry that they did such a pansy job at the start of the class, and they are especially sorry that have done such a sorry-ass job of keeping me centred thus far in my life.
They are even sorry that they looked funny at my hips when I was trying to move my legs without using my hips - because after that particular exercise , those snotty little lazy ass core muscles suffered. They suffered I tell you.
Not a single serene hippy in sight. Not one. Lots of flexible people showing off up front for the first 10 minutes. After that , we were all in it together . Breathing all wrong as we tried valiantly to hold our cores in, our pelvises up , our shoulders back and our rib cages down.
And all this whilst twisting, bending, kicking , holding onto rubber bands and doing crunchies.
Lots of heavy breathing. Lots of moaning. And sadly , it was not the good kind of either.
Somewhere about 15 minutes from the end , my core stopped talking to me. I have been home for 2 hours now and we have yet to resume communications.
I strongly suspect that I will be advised of my indiscretions sometime tomorrow morning, in between waking up and trying to get up for my morning pee.
But that's fine - because those lazy ass core muscles are going to get taken through the motions at 6:30 pm tomorrow night at a Body Balance class.
And then we'll see who's really in charge.
That awesome mind-body-spirit exercise, that conjures up images of serene beauties balanced oh so elegantly and effortlessly on big blue balls .
People wandering around with headbands and flowers and perfect posture, bending and contorting like yoga - but more hardcore, in that special Zen kind of way.
Meh -- not so much hey ....
I just did a Pilates class - at a brand new gym , that I joined a week ago. My first Pilates class as a matter of fact.
I love yoga. I don't get to do it as often as I'd like at the old gym ( they had 1 class a week, which I couldn't always get to because of work) , so when this new gym opened up with promises of Yoga, Pilates and the combo special "Body Balance" at least 7 different times a week - that was me , hooked.
Today was the first Pilates class ever, for both me, and for this particular gym. I think it went well for the gym. I'll let you know how it went for me, when my muscles start talking to me again.
It wasn't too full - a nice big studio, plenty of space - decent sound system, so I could hear the drill-sergeant just fine.
Let me tell you , those core muscles of mine are very sorry. They are very sorry that they dared to be in me, they are very sorry that they did such a pansy job at the start of the class, and they are especially sorry that have done such a sorry-ass job of keeping me centred thus far in my life.
They are even sorry that they looked funny at my hips when I was trying to move my legs without using my hips - because after that particular exercise , those snotty little lazy ass core muscles suffered. They suffered I tell you.
Not a single serene hippy in sight. Not one. Lots of flexible people showing off up front for the first 10 minutes. After that , we were all in it together . Breathing all wrong as we tried valiantly to hold our cores in, our pelvises up , our shoulders back and our rib cages down.
And all this whilst twisting, bending, kicking , holding onto rubber bands and doing crunchies.
Lots of heavy breathing. Lots of moaning. And sadly , it was not the good kind of either.
Somewhere about 15 minutes from the end , my core stopped talking to me. I have been home for 2 hours now and we have yet to resume communications.
I strongly suspect that I will be advised of my indiscretions sometime tomorrow morning, in between waking up and trying to get up for my morning pee.
But that's fine - because those lazy ass core muscles are going to get taken through the motions at 6:30 pm tomorrow night at a Body Balance class.
And then we'll see who's really in charge.
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